pretty things.

here are some pictures i've snapped with my phone in the last few days. they're from places i've been and things i've been doing. my surroundings have been pretty inspiring lately. enjoy!

the other day i stopped to read in the park for a couple of hours. at one point, there was an ice cream truck in the street to my left playing 'do your ears hang low'. it was cute. to my right, there was a boy playing kings of leon on his guitar. he was also singing. in front of me, there was a dad playing catch with his son.....

happy thanksgiving! i'm thankful for being surrounded by such pretty things.

p.s. photos and videos from the bo burnham show will be posted soon!

redo day.

i haven't been very good at writing you lately. i've been in a bit of a rut in more ways than one. it's been a rough last couple of weeks. i feel like yesterday was a bad day for ALOT of people, including myself. but today i'm feeling much better. the night before last, i woke up in a panic and was up for hours with bad, BAD anxiety. i finally fell back asleep and when i woke up yesterday morning i felt fine. i was excited about starting on my christmas projects and feeling really inspired. and then about 2 hours after i got to work, it all went away and the anxiety came back and i wasn't motivated to do anything. i didn't feel like creating anything anymore. this is what i hate about anxiety. it ruins every good emotion i'm capable of having no matter how hard i try to fight it. after a long over due, late night phone conversation with miss moreau, it all went away.

sometimes, we just need to whine.

yesterday, i was especially good at it. i don't mean to complain so much. i'm working on that. but it's nice to know that there are other people out there who just want to complain with me. believe me or not, it helps. it helps just to talk about it so that it no longer becomes JUST my problem. it's not that i don't think anyone else has problems, because i know they do. i just want someone else to feel it for me so that it doesn't weigh so heavy on ONLY me. and that's true for anyone.

today, i woke up feeling refreshed. i decided that i was going to erase yesterday and allow today to be my "redo" day. and by pure chance, and probably the direction and help i prayed for, i stumbled upon a couple of things that helped me to start climbing out of my rut. so i thought i might share them, in hopes that they will help you out a little too. so here they are:

when i get in these awful moods and feel an extreme lack of creativity, it really bothers me. so much so that i feel like i no longer have a creative bone left in my body. this morning while reading one of my favorite blogs, i stumbled upon this post. it was EXACTLY what i needed to hear. if you have the time, or even care at all, read it. it is, to an exact T, how i feel and one day i hope to have the same kind of support she gets from her husband. not to mention, i'm IN LOVE with everything she does. she is an inspiration in more ways than one.

i realize that thanksgiving was two weeks ago. but when i was reading this blog this morning, i found this and it made me happy. and it made me want to find things to be thankful for all the time. not just on the 4th thursday of every november.

i am thankful for my home and all of the people that inhabit it: family, friends, animals and all. i am thankful for the blue sky today. i am thankful for food. i am thankful for the people in this video and for them reminding me to be thankful for simple things. i am thankful for having things to be thankful for. and if i could retweet in this post, i would retweet a hundreds times what the guy with the headphones said about being thankful for the future. "there is always positive in the future." that alone improved my entire attitude.

these things make me want to be better. i'm going to be better. it's a promise. and today, i'm gathering supplies for my christmas projects. i'm ready to start creating again.

source: promise tangeman blog, the rockstar diaries

anything to make you smile. it is a better side of you to admire.

today, i'm in a weird mood. you know like the kind that makes you want to leave everything behind, close yourself off, get rid of everything (and possibly everyone, for the sake of happiness) and start fresh. that's exactly how i feel. and chances are, i'm being overly dramatic. chances are, there's nothing wrong. chances are, i'll feel better tomorrow......chances are, i won't. who knows. i just wish i didn't feel a tug one day and a push the next. i want something to hold me still. keep me in the same happy mood i'm capable of being in. they say running away from your problems isn't the answer. but i believe in some cases, it just may be exactly what we need. somehow, i always choose the hardest route possible. i manage to pick the one that doesn't work. one day, i'll figure it out. i just wish i didn't care so much. but i guess if i didn't, then it wouldn't be worth it, right? i probably give too much and set the bar much higher than i should expect from others. but then again, it's kind of hard to deal with their mood swings. i just wish there was one constant source of good emotion to keep me happy. i just have to keep telling myself that there is a reason for this. there IS a reason for it. i just don't like being apart. that's all. and that's okay.

i have been sick, again, since saturday. i thought at first it might be the flu because i was throwing up and breaking out into cold sweats saturday night/sunday morning. but that only lasted a miserable 24 hours. thank goodness. unfortunately, it came in the middle of brent's show and 2 hours away from my bed, where i probably should have been the whole time anyway. now, i'm stuck with ANOTHER sinus infection and my voice has taken a leave of absence for an undetermined amount of time. awesome for having a job where answering the phone is one of the only things i do. i just want to stop being sick.

***because i was sick, i regretfully didn't take a single picture saturday night. what a shame, because lauren and i looked uber cute. plus she and rimmy were twins. yes twins.***

lately, i've lost my urge to stop spending money just because i'm bored. i've stopped not caring about what i eat. i need to not look like this anymore. maybe this is part of my whole "cleansing" mood. i don't know. about anything.

anyway, enough of the pity party. i hope you all had a wonderful thanksgiving! i'm looking forward to the holidays! christmas is my absolute favorite thing. here are some things that are on my list for this year.

fuji instax mini: polaroid thank you notes: sooo cute!a new record player:
i've been searching for a good vintage one.
it's been tough. the beatles rockband:down pillow top mattress cover:
this is more of a need than a want.
my sleeping issues seem to be getting worse.
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p.s. tyler read just released their new album 'hallelujiaville' on amazon and itunes. if you haven't downloaded it yet....do it. now. it's so so so good. and i'm not just saying that.